OB Dilemma
I’m just not sure what we are going to do about an OB. My current OB/GYN, Dr. M, was awesome when I was pregnant with Calista. I’ve always liked him. However, his is the office that refused to see my last Tuesday, when I was spotting.
The nurse I spoke to kept telling me I couldn’t be seen, there was nothing to be done, and even refused to bring me in after my RE said I should have an ultrasound. My RE even called Dr. M’s office and they still refused to see me.
I told myself if was just a matter of getting past the nurse. She was just giving her cookie-cutter response — no ultrasound before 7 weeks — and had we gotten past her, Dr. M would have seen me.
As you know, we ended up seeing M, the CNMW on Wednesday for our first ultrasound. She scheduled us for a repeat to check the heartbeats this week. As such, I don’t need the appointment with Dr. M this week. Therefore, I called Friday and left a message stating I am pregnant with twins and would like to talk to Dr. M about seeing him through a twin pregnancy. I also said I’d need to change my appointment for May 4th to a later date.
No one called me back on Friday, even though I know their office was open for several hours after I called.
This morning, Dr. M’s receptionist called me about the appointment. I told her we were seeing M in the interim, and have an ultrasound with her this week, so we needed to move back our appointment. She was asking me when I wanted to come in and I said I didn’t really know because I don’t know how Dr. M handles twin pregnancies. The receptionist said that twin pregnancies are treated the same and single pregnancies unless there’s a problem, which is an answer I didn’t especially care for. Sure, not all twin pregnancies are high-risk or have complications, but in all of my reading, twin pregnancies are and should be treated a little differently than a singleton.
Anyhow, I told her I wasn’t sure when to reschedule, as I had hoped to actually talk to Dr. M, to which she replied he would be calling me back (when?, I wonder). I also told her I may see Dr. C, a doctor who’s been recommended to me as he specializes in high-risk pregnancies. The receptionist then countered that Dr. M does high-risk pregnancies as well… which is all fine and dandy, but what good is a specialist if you can’t ever reach them or get the care you need?
So here I sit, still waiting for Dr. M to call me back. I don’t know how long I’ll give him before I give up and move on. I do love Dr. M and had a great experience with him last time, but this whole ordeal in just the past week has left me doubting how comfortable I will be in the care of his office this time around. If he ever calls me back, maybe I can get some answers. My biggest question is if he KNEW my RE called and said I was to come in for an ultrasound, and if so — why did he refuse?
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Honestly,
Many OB’s are less patient oriented than they used to be. I would search for a CNM in your area who is
willing to attend a Twin birth. You could also look into the option of Homebirth for your twins and although I don’t know your birth story with Calista, I would join ICAN and even attend a meeting. There are many women who have had Twins vaginally and at home.
If you have any questions, you can feel free to E-mail me.
I say trust your gut and I think you need a new doctor. Twin pg are different and you need to be comfortable that you are getting treated that way. You are going to have so many questions and you need to feel confident that you can reach your doctor and expect to get an answer back to you.
Just my 2 cents!
In my honest opinion you are going to be dealing with the nurse and receptionist the most so if you are not comfortable with them maybe you should look elsewhere. I switched docs when I was pregnant with my first at 5 months because the office staff was horrible to me. I found a new wonderful doctor and a great nurse and I am glad I did. It made things so much easier. Also I always thought that twin pregnancies were high risk. Maybe I am wrong. anyways good luck and keep up with the updates I love reading them
Sounds to me like it’s time for a change…you clearly are having doubts and better to change now than 20 weeks down the road and you NEED to talk to the doc and can’t get past the nurse! You very likely will feel just as comfortable with another OB-even the high risk one- and may even like their staff much better. After all you’ve gone through to get preggo, the last thing you need to stress over is your doc! Anyway, I’m sure everything will work out one way or another!!!!
When in doubt, don’t. Trust your gut. (((HUGS)))
Sommer,
Do you have Dr. M’s phone number from when he was your doctor delivering Calista? I would try to get in touch with him directly (read: sneakily) and see what’s up. He may not know what’s going on. That happened to my sister and she finally talked to the doc and two of the receptionists were fired.
Just a thought.
gcb
I agree with Randene! The OB that I had when I was pregnant with my girls was wonderful. Even with a singleton pregnancy they always took the time to call me back right away when I had questions. The nurses and office staff were really nice and they did early u/s when I was spotting as soon as I told them what was going on. That’s the way you should be treated, especially with twins which I would think SHOULD be treated differently (they were by my OB).
I’d trust your gut on this one like the others said. If I had an issue I could walk into the office and talk to my midwife within 15 minutes no problem or she would call me back within an hour if I called for her (Exception is when she was in a delivery then another MW would call me back) If you can talk to Dr M and ask him questions but if you don’t like the answers go shopping for a new Dr or it will be a LONG 9 months for you :-)
I’m probably answering a little differently here but I think you should wait and talk to Dr. M first. The whole communication problem could just be the nurse and receptionist and he may have no idea that your RE called. Maybe once he hears the issues you had, he’ll address that with the office and things will change.
I know how you feel about liking a doctor and not wanting to leave. I had a doctor in Florida that delivered both of my boys and then at seven months into the pregnancy with my daughter, I had to move up to PA from a transfer with my husband’s job. I was just sick about having to leave that doctor. BUT, I found someone else that made me just as happy so if that is what you decide to do, just know that there are other doctors out there that will be just as great or even better. :)
Post when you finally hear from them.
Sommer,
I can tell you what I’d do – find a new OB. Hands down. There’s no excuse for such indifference. My dh is a physician and he NEVER lets patients dangle like that. That’s inexcusable in my book. Sorry for sounding like such a hard *^% about the whole thing- I know you really like your OB, but twin pregnancies are different than singletons and you do need extra attention.
Hugs & belly rubs to the twins,
Cheryl
Hopefully he’ll call you back soon and you can get to the bottom of it. But, my instincts say trust your gut! Yes, you had a great experience the first time, but a lot could have changed since then. Good luck with whatever you decide!
Like the PP’s I agree that if you are doubting your OB, then find a new one. This is such a special and magical time in your life, and you want and need someone who will see it the same way you do! If the other OB you are considering has better staff, and you like the OB, then I would go there. I too transferred OB’s with my first pg b/c of the front end staff (receptionist and nurse) and never regretted my decision as I LOVE my new OB and the nurse – I wanted her to be at my delivery she was so great!
Good luck! I know you will make the right decision!
(((hugs)))
My DH is a medical doctor. It sounds like Dr. M’s staff is sabotaging his practice. If you do decide to go with somebody who’s staff is more on the ball, you might want to drop Dr. M a line and let him know about the horrible service you got. He needs to know how his potential patients are being treated. How you were turned down flat when you were spotting. The didn’t even bother calling in blood tests or a progesterone check. And how they told you that twin pgs are treated the same as singletons. It might help him, or at least open his eyes. GL figuring this all out. Remember that you can still switch later if you need to. I punted a doc at 7 months when he told me flat out that I could not vary my birthing position from on my back. Huh! He lost a patient that day.